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The Video Dead

Who doesn't like a good Zombie movie? The problem is finding a GOOD zombie movie. In an era where anyone with a cheap camera and karo syrup can make a "Zombie Film", it becomes near impossible to find one that you could actually enjoy. I understand that film-making amateurs are not going to make a George A. Romero film, but at least follow the basic guidelines. The Video Dead (TVD) is a Horror/Comedy written and directed by Robert Scott with a budget of $80,000, released in 1987. Yeah, I know that $80k seems like a ton of funding cash, but for film-making that is chump change. TVD stars Roxanna Augesen and Rocky Duvall.

The plot speaks for itself!


Robert Scott really thought outside of the box for this film, or, out of the TV you might say. TVD starts with a mysterious crate being delivered to the wrong resident's address. The unlucky recipient opens the crate revealing an old TV set, which he then ignores and continues with his daily routine. Later that night, the TV turns on by itself, showing an old zombie movie on it's screen. The zombies in the televised film are walking through a wooded area towards the camera, which is also towards the TV's viewing screen. After a "Highlander-esque" quickening effect and some addded fog, the zombies crawl out of the mysterious TV from the televised film. The following day, the delivery guys return to pick up the misaddressed crate, but instead find the recipient dead in a chair while wrapped in a lamp cord, wearing a birthday hat with an unlit cigarette in his mouth, and positioned in front of the door with his throat cut.

TVD - Highlander effects
Best way to blow the budget in the first 5 minutes...

Now you might think that this recipient has the worse luck in the world. First he receives a junk TV that turns on by itself. Then zombies crawl out of said TV (let's not forget the major fire hazard exposed by those quickening effects). All the while, a serial killer broke in on this same unlucky night! While this train of thought is the most reasonable explaination of what just happened, it is the wrong one. That's right, the zombies did it! These zombies don't care much for human flesh apparently. I know, bullshit right?! Then again, my mother always said it's not right to put people into stereotypes. And zombies were people at one point or another.

TVD
They are coming for you!

Back to the crazy TV zombies! Three months later, the very same residence has been sold to a new family. Three months! They must have one hell of a real estate agent. Teenage siblings, Zoe and Jeff Blair, are the first to arrive at the new home. Jeff makes quick work on putting the moves on their new neighbor, a blond-haired woman with a little horny dog that has sexual encounters with skunks. The dog apparently can't stand Jeff's smooth moves, and takes off into the woods. On the siblings' first night living in the house, Jeff finds the cursed TV, which is back to its old tricks plus some new ones. Ghostly visions are now coming from the TV. Some good, and some bad. Jeff finds out the key to the ghost/zombie invasions from TV land is tied to one of the ghost. But, by this time it is to late. The zombies are already out of the TV, and are making quick work of the siblings' neighbors.

TVD
Best way to blow your evening's entertainment budget...

I mentioned before that these zombies don't crave human flesh. But, what they do crave is human life! These zombies kill you, then use your appliances and wigs! The nerve of these zombies, am I right?! This is the start of the film's high point. We get some entertaining gags, and surprising kills. However, none of which are really worth sinking your teeth into. This film tried to be a good zombie/ghost/comedy movie. But, by the end of the movie, if you even make it that far, you'll realize that the film-makers failed to deliver all three. Even the most merciful critics would agree. Bad acting, bad writing, and poor cinematography results in this film's rating of:

5Brains 5Brains 5Brains 5Brains 5Brains

1/2 a brain out of 5

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